My name is Bah Htoo and I was born in Burma called (Taw Myae). My village was filled with Karen people and they do had organizations for Karen people. You can say my village was pretty big. My house made out of bamboo and wood and the roof were leaves. I have 8 siblings and there were 4 boys and 4 girls. All of my siblings were nice and one lived in America and the rest still in Burma. I am 6 in the line. I am the closest to one of my siblings who is older than me who’s name is Krima. Krima was nice, patience and knew how to cook. We got along really well because we were raised at the same time. My parents worked in a garden and business in trading. In the garden they planted bitter nut trees and later they would sell it. Almost everyone who lived there have gardens. We woke up at 4 a.m. to cook and getting ready and started going to work at 5 a.m. The reason we woke up early because we had to climb up some hills and took us about 2 hours. We would get to the garden around 7 A.m. We started pulling out weeds and cutting grasses. When it hits around 12 p.m., we would get some rest and ate lunch. Sometimes we got home around 4pm or 5 pm. I worked everyday when I was young, whether it was in the village, farm, and in the house. All of my older siblings got married, so only my older sis and I left in the house to work. We had to work morning, daytime and nighttime. We usually slept at 12 a.m and woke up at 4 a.m. I did all kinds of job when I was really young. When I became an adult I helped around the house, farm and when I got to America I got to help send some  money to my family. I do not work, so I helped out with whatever I could.

I was around 6 or 7 years old when I started cooking. My mom was cooking rice and she could not carried it so it fell on the floor. Since our family was big, we had to make a lot of food. At that time I had to take care of my siblings and my grandparents were at the garden. My first time trying to cook some rice it was not cooked and when my grandma got back home she told me it was not cooked. My grandma had to start all over again. The second time I tried cooking rice and it was actually cooked. I had to work really hard and the reason I am short because I had to grind rice with my bare legs. I was doing shovel work and I accidentally cut my hand and it left with a mark. In my family the foods we made (were goe bli boe), rice, sticky rice, fried rice, sticky rice in bamboo. Karen traditional food usually know as eating rice and lot of vegetables. In the village we would go carried water in (water poe glo) and when we were little we only did drink water because we did not have anything else to eat. The stuff we usually shop for were salt, sugar and (chu moe), because that what we use for the seasoning to cook. Once a year we went to shop at (Pa Tur) and it was far we would go with boat.

I did go to school and I finished till fourth grade, because we did not have a teacher to teach after that grade. School was really good for me and teachers were nice and as well as students. Since we lived more in a village than city, which mean harder live there. I did not graduated so I did not have a dream what I wanted to become. When I was with my friends we would play hide and seek and volleyball. I have never been to big city, because I always lived in the village (coe coe). There were not anything I received that passed down from my family. I was 13 years old when I started working in the garden, because my younger sibling was young and my mom was not feeling well and both of my older siblings were married and my dad was the only one working. Part of the reason was that I did not pass a big exam for school. One of grandpa rule was every year we have to go up to another grade, but since I did not pass the school exam test I have to quit school and work. My older sister passed the test, and she finished up to six grade. After six grade she did not passed the test so she quit.

I have never dated, and there were a lot of guys who wrote letters to me. I did not like them, because none of them were good looking. I only dated my husband when I was 17 or 18 years old. In my village, people secretly dating someone they like, but they would not tell their parents about it. Parents were very strict about dating. My parents did not teach me anything about relationship. My first impression of my husband was that he was as a guest who came to visit and nothing else. I got married with him after I got baptized in (moe lu laj). Because of Burmese soldiers shooting we barely got married. The hardest thing after marriage was seeing my children sick, or also that have to sell the house. If I would see my family and children well, I would feel good and happy about it. I have 5 kids and they is 19, 17, 14,6, and 4 years old. I taught my children to listen, respect parents and elders, be thoughtful, love God and be scared by Him too. When my children were younger, I told them not to go outside when it was raining, because if they get sick I do not have the money to cure them or buy foods. The most important advice I gave them was to not steal and always tell the truth. We celebrated New Year and Ma Htoo Ra’s Day, and Christmas. My parents religion was Christian and they celebrated Christmas.

 I missed the times when I was young. We would go out to sing a lot. We had to walked and crossed the river, and it was so cold. The water reached up to my waist. We did not have a boat to take us. December was the happiest time, because we would walk around and sing. I miss it sometimes. I do not like to sing in America, because we could sing out loud and that would annoy the neighbor, and it is hard to find parking lot, besides people have different religion. In my village, we would go sing till 1 am and there would be tea and sticky rice provided for us. Each family had to go and we would go sing from village to village. I used to eat late at night, and my stomach was upsetting me. A friend of mine had to wait for me, while I was using the bathroom. One time, we went singing and neighborhood was really quiet. Until we showed to their houses and said Merry Christmas, everyone started waking up their kids and lit up the candles. They were really happy to see us. They did not feel being bothered or annoyed from us. Sometimes I think that, I would like to do that again.

 When I was little, I went to school for a little bit. I turned 13 or 14 years old, and I started working for a little while. Burmese came to our village and started shooting. We had to run away. We had to carried a basket made out of bamboo in our backs, and it was filled with mats, clothes, pots and pans. We lasted a year running away from Burmese soldiers. We did not go directly to refugee camp. Burmese soldiers and Karen people were shooting at each other. Some people were naked because they did not have the chance to put clothes on and tried to escaped from the shooting. One time, my husband went to take a shower while I was on my way back to the house carrying water, the Burmese soldiers were hiding behind a tree. They started shooting and everyone started running. It went over us and we were very blessed that nothing happened to us.

My house was close to Burmese soldiers. My husband just wore (tae gu) and nothing else. Where we lived we always have to be cautious, because of Burmese soldiers. One day, I was on my way home climbing the stairs. Poe Gler’s mom was cooking, while my older brother, his wife, and grandpa were on the porch. Poe Gler’s two kids were sleeping. My cousin’s wife died on that day. After the shooting my husband and my dad secretly came back to the village to get some pots, plates and spoon. While the Burmese were shooting, we did not have the time to grab anything. We waited for a week to go back to our village. The Burmese soldiers went somewhere else in 1990-97 in February. We were afraid of them a few months more.

 I came to the refugee camp in July, and later went to place called (Naw Ga Muy Claw in Pu We). We stayed there for 2 or 3 months, then the Burmese soldiers sent us to Tham Hin camp. We stayed there for 11 years, then we came to America. When we were going to refugee camp, we had to walk there. We climbed a few mountains and hills with little children with us and they looked pitiful. There was a guy who got shot, and we had to carried him. He told us he could not make it any longer. I felt really sad for him, and I wanted to cry. I was carrying a bag, and my little sibling. He was younger than me and was chubby. The dirt was eating my little sibling feet. I had to carried him while we were going up the hills or mountain.

I came to America because my children can get an education, live in a nice place, eat well, and have a lot of opportunities. The struggle that I had to face while living in America were not knowing the language, go to places, read or write. The things that satisfied me the most is seeing my children going to the right path, listen well, good health, go anywhere freely and know  how to speak the language.